**Disclaimer** If you know me in my 'real' life and stumble across this blog- please know that I write here for healing, and to feel close to my Noah, and close to my grief. At times these letters may seem sad, angry, and at times, crazy. Please don't worry about me- this is how I help myself heal. If you have questions, just ask- if you know me well at all, you know that I love talking about my Noah.

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Birthday Boy

Dear Noah,

It's your birthday! Your 3rd Birthday!

I"m going to try and not make this  a 'pity party' about how you should be waking me up jumping on the bed saying 'It's My birfday It's my birfday'.. opening presents, eating cake, getting whatever YOU want for dinner. I should be singing to you, and hugging you and kissing you as much as I can.

Instead, I will say.

I love you. You are forever my baby boy- but now, are my big boy too. Forever in my heart- forever alive in my heart and soul.
You are Three.
Three years ago today you made me a mother. Something I had been wanting since I was a little girl playing with dollies. No one can ever take that away from us- You made me a mother.
I love you Noah.
I love you so much.
I love you forever,
Mummy

Here you are- 3 years ago today. Still with the cream in your eyes, just welcomed to the world. You had us from this moment.We thought we'd have you in our arms forever. You are ours- and only physically are you gone. You are loved Noah. Then, Today, Forever.




3 comments:

Stacey said...

Happy 3rd Birthday Noah!!! I know your family misses them but like your mum said your are physically gone but are forever with them. I hope today is gentle on your family as they celebrate and survive another birthday without you!!!!

Sherri said...

Happy Birthday sweet Noah!!!
And big hugs to your Mommy, Daddy, and Charlotte

Hope's Mama said...

Much love to you today. I feel I'm out of words. I can't believe it has been three years for us.
I'm just so sad he's not here.
xo