**Disclaimer** If you know me in my 'real' life and stumble across this blog- please know that I write here for healing, and to feel close to my Noah, and close to my grief. At times these letters may seem sad, angry, and at times, crazy. Please don't worry about me- this is how I help myself heal. If you have questions, just ask- if you know me well at all, you know that I love talking about my Noah.

Friday, September 24, 2010

Perfect

Hi Noah Bear, 

Sometimes I think about how it's nice that I will never be upset at you, or angry at you.. I won't ever be disappointed in a choice you've made, thought your decisions weren't thought about well enough. I won't even have to tell you 'No', give you a time out, send you to your room. 
Really- I'd trade all that obviously to have you here- you could be a holy terror and I'd still rather have you here. 
But.. since you aren't, and that can't change, no  matter how hard I try.. at least you were, are and will be perfect.
Poor Charlotte- has a perfect Brother! don't worry-  I don't expect perfection from a little girl finding her place in the baby/toddler world! 

That was just on my mind this morning.
I love you baby boy
Love you forever, 
Mummy

3 comments:

Dana said...

This is so sweet. I hadn't thought about it that way (yet), but it is true.

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Unknown said...

Bless your heart. Virtual hugs.