**Disclaimer** If you know me in my 'real' life and stumble across this blog- please know that I write here for healing, and to feel close to my Noah, and close to my grief. At times these letters may seem sad, angry, and at times, crazy. Please don't worry about me- this is how I help myself heal. If you have questions, just ask- if you know me well at all, you know that I love talking about my Noah.

Sunday, December 21, 2008


Hi Little Man,

I wish it wouldn't be 'weird' to buy you Christmas presents! If things were different I would be buying toys and cute little clothes... and I would be buying little boy fun wrapping paper... I would have enjoyed that a lot! Instead.. I try to stay away from places where I might run into too much baby stuff.

1 year ago I thought things would be so different... WOW.. how life throws us curveballs.. but this is more than a curveball.. this isn't fair.

I wish you were here with Mummy and Daddy. We miss you a lot.

Come visit me in my dreams tonight my precious boy

Love you forever,